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- This topic has 15 replies, 9 voices, and was last updated 21 years, 8 months ago by zarg01.
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June 29, 2002 at 7:32 pm #7973detn8rParticipant
How many of you have applied for a job at Mc. Donalds? Well check out this form…It has a funny ending..
NAME: Greg BulmashDESIRED POSITION: Reclining. HA But seriously, whatever’s
available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be
applying
here in the first place.DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael
Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible make an offer
and
we can haggle.EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less than I’m worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens
and post-it notes.REASON FOR LEAVING: It stunk.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they’re better suited to a
more intimate environment.MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be
here?DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM
LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would
be “Do you have a car that runs?”HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may
already be a winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.DO YOU SMOKE?: Only when set on fire.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the
Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy super model who thinks I’m the
greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing
that now.DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST
OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: No, but I dare you to prove otherwise.SIGN HERE: Scorpio with Libra rising.
And the funny this is… they hired him!!Edited by – chewybear2001ca on 06/29/2002 14:43:48
June 29, 2002 at 7:40 pm #67993mesuperMemberImage deleted by Jeff – Do NOT post anything that might be considered obscene!
June 29, 2002 at 7:45 pm #67990detn8rParticipantRiiiiiiiiiiiiight…….
Ok let me say, if were going to add anything here… please keep it clean!!Graham — Chewy
You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
June 29, 2002 at 8:00 pm #67988AnnaParticipantThat’s not a genuine McDonald’s application form….
I should know… *cough*cough*cough*
So therefore nobody got hired, even with dumb replies like those. McDonald’s is very tight when hiring beleive it or not….
But then again there’s always TacoTime who are loose as a lost dog….
Windaphoner
RECENT DISCOVERY: Wow! I’m nekkid underneath my clothes!June 30, 2002 at 2:09 am #67989detn8rParticipantteeheehee, maybe I should write to the editor of the web site that I found this from, and put them in position!!! LOL
haha Windy, we always depend on you to figure these things out!
July 6, 2002 at 1:55 am #67991Mr. DiablosMemberMan: Doc, my leg is broken!
Doc: Ok, How’d this happen?
Man: It all started 40 years ago…
Doc: Sir, just tell me how you broke your leg?
Man: I am. 40 years ago, I was driving and my car broke down near a farmhouse. I went in, and asked if I could stay the night. He said I could stay, but the only place I could sleep was his daughter’s room. So, I went in, climbed in bed with her, and she woke up and asked, “is there anything I can do for you?” I said, “nope.” She said, smiling, “Are you suuuuure?” I said, ” Yeah I’m sure. she gave up and finally went to sleep. Then, I left the next morning.
Doc: Interesting, sir, but your leg?
Man: Well, I finally realized what she meant, and I fell off my roof!_____________________
” You’d be such a hottie, if only you kept your mouth shut! “
– Kou Leifoh, The Bouncer
August 15, 2002 at 10:15 pm #67994Xteria864Member?
¤.·´¯`·.,,.·´¯`·.¤®©¤
Philly Sixers!September 14, 2002 at 5:34 pm #68000zarg01Memberthats a pretty funny joke
Quote:quote: Man: Doc, my leg is broken!
Doc: Ok, How’d this happen?
Man: It all started 40 years ago…
Doc: Sir, just tell me how you broke your leg?
Man: I am. 40 years ago, I was driving and my car broke down near a farmhouse. I went in, and asked if I could stay the night. He said I could stay, but the only place I could sleep was his daughter’s room. So, I went in, climbed in bed with her, and she woke up and asked, “is there anything I can do for you?” I said, “nope.” She said, smiling, “Are you suuuuure?” I said, ” Yeah I’m sure. she gave up and finally went to sleep. Then, I left the next morning.
Doc: Interesting, sir, but your leg?
Man: Well, I finally realized what she meant, and I fell off my roof!_____________________
September 14, 2002 at 5:39 pm #67999zarg01MemberQuote:quote: How many of you have applied for a job at Mc. Donalds? Well check out this form…It has a funny ending..detn8r can u plz tell me where teh funny endng s i have seen hundreds of these
some of thing application for eth jerry springer show etc.September 16, 2002 at 3:27 pm #67986rustedtightMemberZarg01,
Next time, please use the edit button instead of posting an extra post so soon after the previous post.
rustedtightSeptember 21, 2002 at 1:20 am #67997VaderXMemberQuote:quote: and I fell off my roof!it kinda makes sense but it isnt that funny, u might wanna edit it and put in something funnier.
CehNehDian!
Edited by – VaderX on 09/20/2002 20:21:03
September 21, 2002 at 8:00 am #67992PhilMemberLOL, hmmm, i thought it was funny maybe thats my simple sense of humour coming into action!
Phil
September 21, 2002 at 2:12 pm #67998zarg01MemberGreat news for Bill Gates
Bill Clinton, Boris Yeltsin, and Bill Gates were called in by God. God informed them that he was very unhappy about what was going on in this world. Since things were so bad, he told the three that he was destroying the Earth in 3 days. They were all allowed to return to their homes and businesses and tell their friends and colleagues what was happening. God did tell them though, that no matter what they did he was “not” changing his mind.Bill Clinton went in and told his staff, “I have good news and bad news for you. First the good news . . . there “is” a God. The bad news is that he is destroying the Earth in 3 days.”
Boris Yeltsin went back and told his staff, “I have good news and terrible news. The first is that there “is” a God. The second is that he is destroying the Earth in 3 days.”
Bill Gates went back and told his staff, “I have good news and good news. First, God thinks I am one of the three most important people in the world. Secondly, you don’t have to fix the bugs in Windows 95.
September 21, 2002 at 9:11 pm #67996VaderXMemberHEHE LOL… good one ZARG!
CehNehDian!
September 21, 2002 at 11:38 pm #67987AnnaParticipantHaw haw…
Okay but my question is… why Clinton, Yeltsin n’ Gates?
Clinton by all means – wouldn’t be considered “special” in god’s eyes for some miscellaneous acts he committed, Yeltsin is almost half-dead n’ Gates? Well he’s just weird. Lol okay so explain it again?Windaphoner
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