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A bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door
bursts open and in come four exuberant blondes. They come up to the bar,
order five bottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit
down at a large table. The corks are popped, the glasses filled and they begin
toasting and chanting “51 days, 51 days, 51 days!” Three more blondes arrive,
take up their drinks and the chanting grows.
“51 days, 51 days, 51 days!” Two more blondes show up and soon their
voices are joined in raising the roof. “51 days, 51 days, 51 days!”
Finally, the tenth blonde comes in with a picture under her arm. She walks
over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts. Up
jump the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging
high-fives, all the while chanting “51 days, 51 days, 51 days!” The bartender can’t
contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to the table. There in
the centre is a beautifully framed child’s puzzle of the Cookie Monster.
When the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asks one of the
blondes, “What’s all the chanting and celebration about?” The blonde, who
brought in the picture pipes in, “Everyone thinks that blondes are dumb
and they make fun of us. So, we decided to set the record straight.Ten of
us got together, bought that puzzle and put it together. The side of the
box said 2-4 years, but we put it together in 51 days!”Couldn’t you have just given a link to the site where these jokes were clearly copied from instead of bombarding us with around 12 different topics
Some more blonde jokes 😀 Sorry, don’t mean to offend anyone 😡
A guy is having a drink in a very dark bar. He leans over to the big woman next to him and says: “Do you want to hear a funny blonde joke?”The big woman replies: “Well, before you tell me that joke, you should know something. I’m blonde, six feet tall, 210 pounds, and I’m a professional athlete and bodybuilder. Also, the blonde woman sitting next to me is 6’2″, weighs 220 pounds and is an ex-professional wrestler. And next to her is a blonde who is 6’5″, weighs 245 pounds, and she is a current professional kickboxer. Now, do you still want to tell me that blonde joke?”The guy thinks about it a second and says: “Nah, not if I’m gonna have to explain it three times.”
A blonde was hired to paint the yellow stripes on the highway. Her first day she painted 10 miles. The second day she only painted 5. Her boss, seeing how she was getting slower decided to give her a day off, thinking that she needed a rest. When she came back the next day, she only painted .5 miles.Her now discouraged boss came up to her one day and said, “Excuse me, but why have u been painting less and less each day, even after I gave you a day off?”
“Simple,” the blonde answered, “I’ve been getting farther away from the paint can!”
A woman walks into the doctors office and says, “Doctor I hurt all over.”The doctor says, “That’s impossible.”
“No really! Just look, when I touch my arm, ouch! it hurts.
When I touch my leg, ouch!, it hurts.
When I touch my head, ouch!, it hurts.
When I touch my chest, ouch!!, it really hurts,” she replies.
The doctor just shakes his head and says,
“You’re a natural blonde aren’t you?” The woman smiles and says, “Why yes I am. How did you know?”
The doctor replies, “Because your finger is broken.”
I think that blonde jokes are one of the funniest jokes ever. Im not blonde but if i was i would probably wouldn’t be affended cuz there just jokes. The jokes that were told were good ones.
I’m a blonde and I don’t get offended my blonde jokes, because then I’d have to stop making man jokes like these ones because men might get offended.
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving
each other the silent treatment. The next week, the man realized that he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight to Chicago. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (AND LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, “Please wake me at 5:00 AM.”The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and
that he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn’t awakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.”Moral: Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
A man and a woman are driving towards each other on the highway. They meet as the woman comes around a corner. The woman leans out of her window and shouts “PIG!”. The man leans out of his window and responds “BITCH!”The man goes around the corner and crashes into a huge pig
Moral: Men should learn to listen
Im a blonde to..heres one..its kinda old though…
*A blonde a burnette and a red head were stranded on an island..
*then a genie comes out and grantes them each 3 wishes
*The burnette wishes to go get married and to be rich..and poof, she was gone
*The red head wishes that she was off this island..and at a party..poof she was gone
*The blonde wishes that her two friends were back with her on the island..and poof they were back
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