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Ok, I’m having some serious trust issues with my bf. Some time back we gave eachother the passwords to our yahoo email/IM accounts. Let me clarify that he uses both a computer and a treo phone.
Last night I noticed a yahoo IM name in his address book. Let’s just say her screen name stood out to put it mildly. It showed her entry as being updated Oct 3, 2006.
I was furious to not only find this name, but the timing becuase of my bday and we were totally exclusive ( or were we ??? ) by that point.
I asked him about it and he claims to not know who this is. Says it must be some old left over name of someone he chatted with before he deleted old screen names, etc.
He’s telling me that his yahoo/treo phone automatically adds someone on your buddy list to the address or contact list in the email.
Is that true??????
My regular yahoo doesn’t do this. My stance is if this is someone he never met, never talked to, etc. WHY did he go to the trouble to add her to his address book?
He claims when he deleted old screen names and buddy lists that this one must have slipped by and that the update listed was when he was working to delete his old name ( which is around the time I remember him doing this ).
However, this just isn’t adding up to me. He keeps telling me that his yahoo works differently becuase of how it’s merged with his treo. My question is: Would HIS yahoo automatically add someone to an address book? Also, what does the update date really mean? Is this when he added her? Or could he be telling me the truth and that date is perhaps when he merged things with his computer and phone.
He’s given me reason to not trust him in the past, but I thought we were long past that. Now, this has me wondering. Also, MOST people I know have one main account and then other screen names set up under that account. HE has two ( that I know of ) accounts set up separately. So, he could very well have other accounts and I’d have no clue.
Can someone shed some light on this whole addrress book and update listing for me? I’d like to believe him, but I find this suspicious. He also had told me once in the past that he never talked with anyone after me, but I found he was added on some chick’s 360 3 or 4 months after we started seeing eachother. So, I’m not sure what to believe anymore.
Thanks for any help. 🙂 Missy
To be honest i don’t use a treo fone (whatever they are)
However address book and buddylist are two seperate list and ids he had deleted on his buddylist can stay/remain in his address book
since you said the id stands out it could have been a pornbot that added him (yes they do that and invite you to conferences)
update date just means the last time they changed something on their profiles from name to nickname to age, any change will change that update date.
If this id was there from over a year ago or before, no point pulling up old roots really.
He could have more accounts as you could have more accounts..but thats speculation..
Perhaps you should ask him if he knows the girl on the 360, it could be a friend or a infrequent yahoo chatter he got talking to, fact is im sure you will at least agree he can have female friends?
But if you don’t trust him or believe him, theres not much to work on 🙂
Thank you, it’s not a bot. It’s just a local chick with a cam and sexy ID. He recognized the name, but couldn’t recall who this was and I’m ok with that. Heck, I’ve chatted with guys in the past who I’d have trouble recalling.
What’s bugging me is that he’s saying he never talked with her on the phone, never met, etc…..yet he obviously went to the trouble to ADD her to his address book.
He is trying to tell me Yahoo just automatically adds someone on your buddy list to the address book. Since those are two separate issues, that’s a lie.
The date I’m referring to isn’t on HER profile. I know that’s just the last time SHE updated. On his address book you can see a date when HE updated it. He’s saying maybe it updated it when he merged his treo and computer. But, wouldn’t everyone have the same date then? Or several people would?
I’m meeting him in a few to talk. I did ask him about the 360 girl and he said he didn’t know he was added and he only casually chatted with her, etc.
Anyway, thanks for your help and you’re right I’ll have to decide if can trust him or not. It’s obviously more involved than I got into on here. But, for the technical part of this story, I knew someone on here would know. Thank you so much for your help and for being so sweet.
🙂 Missy
Yahoo adds every buddy to the address book because they use the listing as thus
which is why when messenger is first run it can check your other address books for yahoo related ids.
As for the address book having a specific date, not sure about that not having the treo fone.
you could always chain him to the basement and not let him out lol
on another note, yes its up to you whether you want to trust him or not, but smoothering him with accusations will lead to problems sooner or later.
🙂
Yahoo adds every buddy to the address book because they use the listing as thus
which is why when messenger is first run it can check your other address books for yahoo related ids.
As for the address book having a specific date, not sure about that not having the treo fone.
you could always chain him to the basement and not let him out lol
on another note, yes its up to you whether you want to trust him or not, but smoothering him with accusations will lead to problems sooner or later.
haha….he might enjoy being chained in the basement. 🙂 I’ve dropped it, no interrogations. I trust him and know he loves me. I think this was a “name” from the past that he just failed to “clean-up” when he cleaned up his list. I could have easily made the same “mistake”. Most of us have pasts and it’s clear this was nothing more than some online fun B.M……..before ME.
Thanks, Dermot! 🙂 Missy
Aside from the mysterious girl on his list, is he givng you any other reason to doubt him? You could install a keylogger and see if he is doing something behind your back. But, if you have to go through the lengths of doing that, then you two need to talk, there’s more going on inside of your relationship, some trust issues that need to be talked about and fixed.
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