Home › Forums › Archives › Community Center › The BigBlueBall Lounge › What Makes You Laugh? › Be Proud to be British!
- This topic has 6 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 21 years, 7 months ago by
gossipingrae.
-
AuthorPosts
-
March 7, 2005 at 8:33 am #17313
sarahtowny
MemberAnd I can get away with this because I am! hehe:D
Best of British
Be very proud to be British Because:
Only in Britain… can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain… do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain… do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.
Only in Britain… do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Britain… do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Britain… do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won’t miss a call from someone we didn’t want to talk to in the first place.
Only in Britain… are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.
NOT TO MENTION…
3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.
31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.
British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.
101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.
18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
8 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars.
And finally………
In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.
RULE BRITANNIA!!March 7, 2005 at 2:23 pm #116354Oreo
MemberHEE HEE HEE…..though…a LOT of those could be said for the USA…yet we are a product of Britain…so, really we’re just emulating the champs. Very nice….especially the ciagrette one…that’s true here too!
March 7, 2005 at 4:01 pm #116358gossipingrae
Memberi thought the same thing as oreo…a lot of those things are true about americans. although, i’m sure if i posted something on here that said “proud to be an american,” some people would call us americans some mean names, but aside from that, it was a good read!
March 7, 2005 at 6:51 pm #116356Red Devil
MemberHeh, very true. Especially the pizza being faster than the ambulance… Personal experience. Waiting an hour and a half for an ambulance when your knee is on the side of your leg is not fun. At least I can get a Pizza in about 15 mins though. :p
March 7, 2005 at 11:41 pm #116355Oreo
MemberToo bad pizza cars don’t carry Medics as well…hee hee hee. Things were like that in PR…in fact people did not move out of the way when an ambulence showed up on the street….that might have something to do with it…
March 8, 2005 at 2:19 am #116353detn8r
ParticipantQuote:In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.Only in Canada is this number x5. *sigh*
March 8, 2005 at 3:40 am #116357neo_ny_23
MemberHey how about using the Pizza cars as the ambulances? Not only the patient goes to the Hospital on time, his/her family members can get Pizza too!!!! That can save many lives… And the number of deaths and injuries, are just……ouch!!!!
-
AuthorPosts
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.