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December 6, 2004 at 2:11 am #15180QuiksilverMember
Ever lost a friend? I’m going thorugh it again I think…if you read my story in the “Who likes who” topic you’d know what I’m talking about. If someone culd get that and post it here that’d be greatly appreciated.
So my friend pretended to be someone on my site that doesn’t exist. Of course I was kind of pissed. Now my friend doesn’t admit it. Her other two friends are also my friends so now they’re set against me as well…I sit with them every day at lunch because they’re some of my closest friends. Now they’re all mad at me and tell me I changed and that I’m always mean. They don’t understand me but they refuse to understand me…they’re really good friends and I thought I could trust them but…I think it’s over now. I don’t want it to be over!!!! I need help…serious help because I don’t want to lose thee of my best friends! Someone please help me…help…me. I’m so sad…I cried….I cried…
No one understands me…you all seem to. No one else does. No one accepts me because I act and do things differently than them. They refuse to understand and accept me even thoug I’ve been friends with them for a while know….such happy memories. I just don’t know what to do…………….should I change myself? I know I can’t…
I’m always depressed…always. I act happy and hyper in school but no one knows the truth…of me. The truth that I’m often sad and no one realizes the truth or that I need some friendly words once in a while…
Second Part:
We’ve had past arguments but this one is somehow different…something small turned into an argument of friends and who I am. They accused me of being mean all the time…I told them they don’t understand me and they say they don’t want to…
I told them that I’m about to cry and they said whatever. I asked them if they even cared about me anymore and they didn’t reply….
-quik is in need of help 🙁Edit: Where I said look in another forum don’t pay attention to it. I copied this from another forum where I posted it as well….son’t get confused ;).
December 6, 2004 at 3:14 am #107734SmittizzleMemberYep… sounds like a typical teenage problem.
You’re screwed.
December 6, 2004 at 3:48 am #107727OreoMemberWell, you know what…that’s one of those things that happen…especially when you’re in middle and high school. I strayed from most of my friends at the end of Senior year because I found out that they just stabbed everyone in the back while smiling to your face. (Which at the time seemed TERRIBLE…and now that I’m writing this…I realize it prepared me for the real world I had to face recently…but instead of staying friends with people like that for years and sharing everything with them…I figured them out MUCH sooner [like within weeks] and guarded myself from worse things).
Sometimes you have to look at yourself if all of your friends are saying this…have YOU changed or have they started to change? Something else you have to understand (especially with girls) is that they get CATTY…and they may have picked you out to pick on…it sucks…but that happens.
Another thing you have to do, is not leave yourself without options. Always have other people that you talk to sometimes…so if they piss you off again…just be like…whatever…and talk to other people at lunch. It’s OK to do that…even though I know lunch time is a BIG thing and who you sit with or IF you sit with anyone is a HUGE thing. Just wait a bit…things will settle down. Also, try talking to ONE of the girls in the group ALONE, the one that you feel understands you the best. If you talk to all of them together…it’s SOOOO not going to work. I know you’ll get through this…and remember…everyone feels like you do when they’re your age…some people just hide it really well. Even the stuck up ones are insecure…in fact, in some cases they are more insecure than the rest of the kids. Especially the really, really mean ones… Just be happy being yourself…if you are different live it up and be proud of your differences. This will be almost impossible at your age…but try not to care what the people around you say…just be yourself and be proud, you’ll actually probably attract some friends by being confident. 🙂December 6, 2004 at 4:16 am #107732kyuubiMember*sigh*…
Sometimes, the best thing is to let go. Maybe it’s time that you moved on, if your friends refuses to realize and respect for what you do and who you are, then they are probabely not worth your time…or your tears. Instead, find someone else who can respond to you, to your needs and who will make you happy when you hang around with them. What’s the point of saving this friendship which will ultimatly make you suffer?. A friendship is something one should enjoy, not something that brings you pain and tears. It might be hard to move on, but this is one of the lesson that life is trying to teach you.
Ask them. If they don’t care for you. If they are not willing to accept you. If they are not willing to help you through difficult times. Than what is the point of the friendship?. Maybe you have changed, but often times, you are not the only one. When friends enter high school, they meet people, and they change. And sometimes, lots of times, things especially with friends will not work out the way you want to.
So save your self some trouble and tears and simply move on. Remeber, if they are not willing to help/accept for who you are. Then simply a whatever and a good bye is all you’re going to need.
If this is going to work out like this, than do them and your self a favor. Forgive them. Forgive them for what they have done to you, and simply leave it as that. No hate, no tears just a simply move on. Take it form me. It is a lot better like that then going down with a argument that you will regret for the rest of your life.
Welcome to Life Lesson 101. ;D
December 6, 2004 at 4:50 am #107728Hurricane22491MemberI agree with kyuubi. Just forget about it.
Give them a punch though (literally). And a good one at that. I’ve found that it makes people think about what they’ve done.
December 6, 2004 at 5:06 am #107733gossipingraeMemberi know what you feel like. for a year and a half, I became really close friends with my (old) roommate. I felt like that although I had just met her, we had become so tight with each other.
then her boyfriend moved in with us, and I became the third wheel. I thought (and stil believe to this very day) he was a freeloader, just living with us, without a job, no money etc. so I told him if he wanted to live with us, he had to split the bills with us. so he got mad, and she got mad (of course she sided with him)…and the 3 of us got into a fight…and she couldn’t stand that we were all fighting and she left…and of course, he and I got into an argument…and guess where I landed? on my face, I went through a table. and I moved out this past may and haven’t seen or talked to either one of them.
it makes me sad. I would still like to be friends with her. we were so close, and we had to end it…because of her boyfriend.
it hurts so much to lose a friend. but in the end, if they REALLY cared for you, they would still be there for you. try to think of it this way, quik.
keep your head high…we care about you here, and other people in your life care about you too! 🙂
December 7, 2004 at 12:52 am #107731QuiksilverMemberYeah…it settled itself magically. Today the ones I didn’t talk to about it talked to me and the one I had a convo with gave up on being mad at me as well. I was kind of lost because I had no one to spill my feelings to. I’m always depressed these days, for one reason or the other. I actualyl am pretty much keeping in my real feelings all the time, so until I told them how I really feel they had NO idea as to who, or what I am. YOu have to understand that I’m always goofing around and acting happy/hyper in school. I’m just hiding my feelings and it felt good to tell them about secrets…and yesterday when this happened I got lost and confused…I’m really glad all of you tried to help me…I knew I could get nice words from you! Anyway…I gotta hurry up and do my homework…see ya round sometime…whenever I’m on, that is!
-n0rmal quik
Any other problems I have, I trust you guys will help me!February 2, 2005 at 8:24 am #107729QwertyMemberHurricane22491 wrote:I agree with kyuubi. Just forget about it.Give them a punch though (literally). And a good one at that. I’ve found that it makes people think about what they’ve done.Yeah thats a hell good idea. Then they won’t think your mean.
February 28, 2005 at 9:12 am #107735-bAbY_meX-ParticipantWell, this might be cliché, but I think you have to talk. If that doesn’t work, well then, hang out with some of your other friends! You can’t call them real friends if they don’t take time to understand you and hear your side, can you?
April 14, 2005 at 8:26 pm #107730neo_ny_23MemberNope, I dont agree with Baby_mex about talking with them. Dont talk about it. I mean talk with them about bunch of other stuff, but dont talk about relationship crap. No one wants to discuss those things and no one wants to be a philosopher at this age. If you ask them, they will assume that you are a “wussy” and move farther from you.
Step 1: Try to find out who are really close to you. If no one is close to you, throw a party or do something cool (academically or computers or technologically or help some friend) and win his/her attention. After winning his/her attention try to be friendly with him/her.. Not too close.. Just friendly.
Step 2: In the mean time, NEVER give undue advantage or importance to any friend. Look for a friend who needs similar kind of help or any kind of help and go and help him/her.
Step 3: Repeat steps 1 and 2 again and again untill and unless you get a whole bunch of close friends (TIP 1: Going to gym regularly helps).
Step 4: Do some thing for them so that they are grateful to you. Like throw off a nice big party.
Step 5: Never bow infront a friend. Develop your OWN identity but doesnt mean that you should develop an attitude. People dont like people who have attitudes.
Step 6: If some one wants to fight with you or some one wants to argue with you or some one is talking behind ur back, screw him/her. Dont bother about it. If some one calls u name, just laugh it off, because you WONT get anything in drawing him/her into a discussiong/fight. And thats what his/her motive is, that is, to piss you off.
REMEMBER: No matter what happens, keep you cool and never get pissed off. Keep talking friendly and cool stuff but DONT talk about relationship with any one, unless sum 1 is 300% closer to you.
TIP 2: Going to gym helps in curbing ur depression and meeting new and cooler people and also gives you a confidence and respect from other people.
TIP 3: DONT ask too many questions. No matter whatever it is, if you dont get it, pretend that you are getting it, but DONT ask more than 3 questions.
Thats all I can say.
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