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- This topic has 4 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 20 years, 10 months ago by darkjedi.
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July 10, 2003 at 5:26 pm #12875tangledlisaMember
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror – make mental note to
do more sit-ups
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it’s clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced
with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap
hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the ‘woo-woo’ sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the ‘woo-woo’ sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed.This gave me a good laugh today, thought I’d share if ya haven’t seen it yet.
July 10, 2003 at 6:07 pm #93629OreoMemberThis is an excellent joke. I actually read it off to my father!! He started to laugh…until he remembered he was my father and said “Don’t you have anything better to do with your time??” That’s how you know a joke is REALLY good when parents react that way! Thanks!
July 11, 2003 at 12:51 am #93631darkjediMemberHmmm so thats why it takes women so long to take a shower hehe. Dont get the covering up exposed parts so husband cant see though, after all you two are married and have sex so why cover up? Hehehehe.
July 11, 2003 at 1:02 am #93630DavidParticipantQuote:quote:Originally posted by darkjediHmmm so thats why it takes women so long to take a shower hehe. Dont get the covering up exposed parts so husband cant see though, after all you two are married and have sex so why cover up? Hehehehe.
Don’t bother even asking, guys aren’t going to understand girls ever anyway, LOL.
Thanks for the laugh, that was great…. woo-woo.:D
July 11, 2003 at 2:08 am #93628FaizanMemberLOL Nice one!
Hmm I first kinda found it sexist for girls but when I saw the second bit about boys, i then found it equal!
But, thanks for sharing, I didn’t have a good laugh from like 2 weeks. 🙂 -
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