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November 11, 2004 at 4:09 am #14675FirefoxManMember
EDIT: nevermind, all cleared up.
November 11, 2004 at 4:31 am #104450DavidParticipantWhy don’t you just do “the stuff” that she wants to do with you before you ask her out?
November 11, 2004 at 4:38 am #104449OreoMemberThat’s a really good suggestion Dave. It’s better to find out if you are really compatible before you just jump in and ask her out. Chances are she really does like you in some way or another. Hang out with her and make sure it’s not just in a “I like you as a friend” way. Besides, some of the best relationships start out as friendships.
November 11, 2004 at 6:43 am #104445Jeff HesterKeymasterbite the bullet.. how bout developing a good old fashioned friendship first – as dave suggested or am I that out of touch with the kids of today
November 11, 2004 at 2:36 pm #104457amy_d_gParticipantI agree with Oreo and Alleycat… just hang out with her for a while, do the things she asks you to do etc… It’s a great way to get to know each other first without all the pressure of being on a date. Then, if and when you do start a relationship, you will have more of a connection, actually knowing each other a bit. That’s exactly how my hubby and I started out. Actually when we first met, he was interested in me, but I really didn’t look at him as anything but a friend, and wasn’t looking for anything more. But then something clicked, and here we are. So it worked out quite well that way!
November 12, 2004 at 4:46 am #104458FirefoxManMemberEDIT: sorry about this, but this subject kind of made me embarrassed lol…
November 12, 2004 at 2:15 pm #104446Jeff HesterKeymasterWhy don’t you just simply ask her?
November 12, 2004 at 4:30 pm #104447PhilMemberIf it’s going to happen, then it will….go out, do things as “friends” and then if its meant to be, you’ll both realise…things like this shouldn’t be planned…its much more fun to keep it as a surprise…
November 12, 2004 at 11:58 pm #104452RabidKittenParticipantI found that every meaningful relationship starts out as good friends and just…happens to slip into the rest. I mean, I’ve never ever been on a “date” in my life, but have had 3 good, meaningful relationships. Davie and the rest have a good deal here, my man, just let it linger and go on, do what you do and all of that, and if you start getting little signs that she likes you more than a friend then it’ll just slip into it later. Kind of a natural progression to these things.
November 13, 2004 at 2:05 am #104455QuiksilverMemberMore fun to keep it not planned? Wouldn’t be my choice of words. Actually…it’s pretty hard to find the right thing to say to you about the issue, FirefoxMan. You can’t really say it just “happens” (which it sometimes does) or tell you do to something (which you have to do sometimes). You see…the thing is that it’s different with every girl. You have to know if she’s shy or not and etc. Get into all the complicated stuff…and it’s complicated and confusing and that’s why it’s impossible for us guys to know what these girls are up to…as natural progression (as RK said) could be another thing…I have a theory for you: Since she’s starting to hang out with you more you’re going to start seeing more and more of her until the relationship “evolves” or “naturall progresses” (given the fact that she likes you, of course). No guarantees but it does seem extremely likely in your case! Now…good luck!
-a wishing to know everything about girls quik 😉
As Nike says: Just Do it ;)!November 13, 2004 at 5:34 am #104460vitor_brMemberthere are only 3 ways she could answer you ” YES” ” NO”, most of the times ”MAYBE” . go head just ask ,,,,dint wait a life time ,, soon you two are going to be so good friends that she will prefer to want you as that picture ,,
get it? I hope so.. kkkkk!!! (: good luck !!pl@y@!!
November 14, 2004 at 12:37 am #104453RabidKittenParticipant*sardonic glance* You do realize that if she hasn’t developed those feelings yet and he comes out with it and she says no that it could skew the entire relationship they have now, right vitor? Believe me, I know how it is to have a good friend come out to you like that and from then on it’s like “ugh….” hesitation no matter how much you try to ignore it. It’s really just a risk factor, and really an oversimplification to say “you have one of three, go for it”. Haven’t you learned about falacies yet?
November 14, 2004 at 12:42 am #104456QuiksilverMemberI’ve had my experiences. This post comes from my heart (yes I DO have a heart). Never, never, never ask out a friend without information. Never. Don’t do it. Chances are she’ll say no and you’re screwed. You’re screwed because you’ve just been denied and you just lost a good friend (good friend in most cases). I’m talking from the heart here. Don’t listen to vitor and his post. I know he’s trying to contribute, but that isn’t going to work. She is your friend. You do not want to go through losing a good friend. Personal experience. I was stunned the whole entire 7th grade at my mistake. Thinking about it really hurts…she was such a good friend I…
-:( quikNovember 14, 2004 at 5:15 am #104454QwertyMemberQuote:quote:Originally posted by RabidKittenI found that every meaningful relationship starts out as good friends and just…happens to slip into the rest.
Yep. mates before dates. That’s what I always say.;)
November 16, 2004 at 2:14 am #104448sciencefeelingMemberI don’t necessarely agree with you Qwerty. Not as a general rule.
My feeling is that there are cases, where friendship is so strong and good that you shouldn’t turn it into romance, even if romance could be potentially good, because is not worth the risk.
Sometimes you get so close as friends that romance becomes scary. Sometimes you become so close that mistery is gone, sometimes you know so much about the other person and they know so much about you that is no worth risking it for passion.
Sometimes is better to start with attraction first and discover personality slowly afterwards. Of course, they will turn into friendship and closeness with time, or they won’t and then is when you can tell it is going to last.
To me, the other way around only works when there is nothing better around, or when someone wants to stabilize and settles for what is more confortable, but that is just an opinion.N.-
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